Johnny's Lighter
by Rogue238
Summary: Reality 777. Dedicated to Cat2Fat900. This is the tale of How Pyro Found His Lighter. Outake from A Split in Reality. ONESHOT. Rated T to be safe. Please read and Review.


**Disclaimer: Rogue238 does not own the X-Men or any other Marvel characters. She only borrows them for her twisted plot lines.**

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A/N: This story is a one-shot outtake of my story, 777 A Split in Reality. It takes place right when Rogue sneaks out to go see Dr. Essex. If you haven't read that story, go do so now, and review it. . . hee hee. This might be slightly Johnda.

And now without further ado. . .

**Johnny's Lighter**

The morning started out normal. Pyro went to the kitchen to get breakfast. However, with all the new people, he practically had to fight his way through. He ended up scaring them all away with his lighter. Smiling he sat down to eat as the chaos resumed around him. Remy had entered in and everyone had paused and let him through. John had noticed the boys were afraid of Remy and Remy seemed to enjoy their fear. He was making a tray for Rogue. She'd had an episode at the rally the night before and he was sick with worry. Pyro grinned at him as he left and the chaos once again returned.

So, that is where Pyro is when Rogue yells his name over the noise.

"Yeah," he yells back.

"Can Ah borrow your lighteh? That pretty one with the flames on the side?"

"Yeah, let me go get it for you, sheila. But you can't let it leave the base."

"Ya think Remy, Wanda, or Magsy are gonna let me anywhere near the door?"

He laughs. "Ya got a point, mate." He heads towards the room. It takes him three seconds to get to the place where he keeps his favorite lighter. He open the drawer and "_AAAAAHHHHHH!"_ the scream echoes through the house as Pyro can't find his lighter. Everyone rushes in. He takes the drawer out and empties it on the bed, throwing the empty drawer on the floor. He rummages through the stuff at lightning speed. Then, he screams again.

"What is going on?" Wanda says, going to his side and placing her hand on his shoulder.

"My lighter is missing!" he screams.

Remy looks at Piotr and raises his eyebrows. "Great." He mouths sarcastically.

"Who took my lighter!" Pyro whirls around glaring into everyone's eyes.

"Slow down, mon ami," Remy says, "What make you t'ink any of us took it?"

"It's gone! I need it and it's gone!"

"John, you have a lighter in your pocket." Wanda says softly.

"I know that, sheila!" Pyro says, "but I need my special one!"

"Not _that_ lighter!" Piotr exclaims.

"Yes! _That _lighter!" John says, starting to cry.

Wanda's heart melts as she looks at him. "John, it's just a lighter. . ."

She was going to say more but he cut her off, "Just a lighter! And I suppose the Statue of Liberty is just a statue. And the Eiffel Tower is just a tower! And the sun is just a star! And. . ."

"Okay, okay, I get it! Just calm down!" Wanda shouts.

"Where did you last see the lighter?" Fred asks.

"In the drawer that I just threw on the floor!" Pyro screams.

"Whatifyouputitinadifferentdrawerbyaccident?" Pietro asks.

A dumbfounded look crosses Pyro's face. "I hadn't even thought of that, mate."

One by one, the other drawers are taken out of the dresser and emptied on the bed and then thrown to the floor. Pyro sift through the mess by throwing all the clothes and other various items on the floor as well. Several lighters turn up, but the pretty one with the flames on the side is still gone.

By this time, Pyro has forgotten why he needed the lighter, he's just so upset that it's gone.

"All right, let us spread out and search each room," Piotr says.

"Good idea, homme," Remy says.

Magneto and Sabretooth agree quickly as well. Wanda, Pietro, Lance, Todd, and Fred, all look at them as if they'd all lost their minds. For Pyro it is very nearly true.

"My baby!" he cries as he tears his room apart, "Where have you gone!"

Wanda stays nearby to help him. She starts trying to reorganize the mess Pyro is making. It is a nearly impossible job. The lighter is not in Pyro's room.

Remy goes into the room he shares with Rogue. She isn't there. He shrugs and decides she must be searching some other room. He looks everywhere, without making as big a mess as Pyro. The lighter is not in their room. He moves to their bathroom, but it's not in there either.

Magneto goes to his bedroom. He uses his powers to bring out all the metal hiding in his room. The lighter is not in his room. He heads to his office and does the same thing. The lighter is not in his office.

Sabretooth calmly goes back to the kitchen and sits down with the newspaper. He smiles at it because it has lots of pictures. Sabretooth hates reading. The lighter is not in the newspaper.

Piotr heads to his room and searches almost as frantically as Pyro. The lighter is not in his room.

Lance and Fred head to their shared room and turn it inside out as they hear Pyro screaming, "My lighter! Give me back my lighter! Somebody find my lighter!" They shudder, and continue their search, but the lighter is not in their room.

Pietro and Toad seem to find all of this highly amusing. Only, Todd is slightly angry because Wanda is staying so close to John. They laugh and each of them go to their separate rooms. They both turn each room inside out. The lighter is not in either room.

Wanda leads John to her room. They search everywhere. Wanda catches every breakable thing that Pyro throws, so little damage is done to her room. The lighter is not in Wanda's room.

This continues for a very long time as they end up in every room, including Sabretooth's, searching for the missing lighter. Sabretooth moves to the rec room and sits on a chair with his newspaper, staring at the pretty pictures, happily.

Finally, Pyro grabs one of the couch cushions from the floor and places it on the couch. He sits down and cries. "My lighter. . . Oh, my poor, poor, lighter. . . I'll never see it again. . ."

Wanda picks up another cushion and sets it down next to John's. She sits down on it and places a comforting hand on his back. "Oh, John, don't cry. It'll be okay. I'll get you another lighter."

"It won't be the same!" he cries. "It can't be. . . I, I just can't believe it. . . Why would anyone do this to me?" He buries his head in his hands and sobs uncontrollably.

Magneto sighs. He hates it when Pyro loses it like this. He is about to start lecturing him when Mastermind walks in.

"Uh, sir, can I talk to you?"

"Yes, yes, to my office. . ."

Mastermind looks around at the mess in wonder, "Uh, what, might I ask, happened here?"

"Pyro lost his lighter. . ."

"Ooh, that's bad. . ."

Mastermind and Magneto head to Magneto's office.

"My lighter!" Pyro continues to sob.

"Remy sorry, mon ami, but we've looked everywhere." Remy says softly.

"Did you look under that loose brick in the fireplace?" Sabretooth asks cheerfully, surprising everyone.

"Uh, no. . ." Piotr says.

"Why would we look there?" Toad asks.

"Cause that's where I saw Rogue put it this morning." Sabretooth says matter-of-factly.

"Huh?" Fred says, "Why would Rogue do that?"

Pyro jumps up and runs to the loose brick. He grabs it and throws it into the air. It goes up and luckily lands on Fred's stomach. It bounces harmlessly on the floor.

There, shining among the mortar inside the hole, sits Johnny's Lighter. He gingerly reaches in the hole and plucks it out slowly. He turns it over slowly in his hands. The lighter seems unharmed. He opens it and flicks it on. It lights. "Wahoo! My lighter's back! My lighter's back!" he chants over and over. He runs to Wanda and picks her up in an enormous bear hug. He twirls her around. He is still chanting.

"Hey, where is Rogue any way?" Lance asks, scratching his head.

"Yeah. Ihaven'tseenhersinceshecametothekitchenandaskedtoborrowthatlighter. . ." Pietro says.

Realization dawns on Remy's face. "Oh, great! Rogue!" He yells, running back to their room. "You better not have snuck out!"

But none of that phases Johnny, because he has once again been reunited with his beloved lighter.

**THE END**

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A/N: I hope you enjoyed reading this, mostly CF, but any one else who loves Pyro and his lighters too. I suppose it isn't too necessary to read ASIR in order to enjoy this. . . Only it explains why Rogue, Wanda, Toad, Lance, Pietro, and Blob all live with Magneto.

Please review.


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